Between the Sheets

Sex.

Who knew a three-letter word could be so controversial? Sex is one of the most natural aspects of life, yet we still squirm when we hear the words “penis” and “vagina”.

Now, I should start this column by stating that I am nowhere near an expert, nor will I try to present myself as such. However, I firmly believe this is a necessary topic to open up. Sex can be uncomfortable and weird sometimes, but it can also be beautiful! We can learn so much from each other if we let ourselves be comfortable in our sexuality.

With that being said, I’d like to introduce my first topic of discussion: communication.
Whether you’re asking your partner if they’re into BDSM or simply thinking of the nicest way to tell bae you’re just not feeling it that night, communication is definitely key to a healthy relationship.
Sex is everywhere. We see sex (sometimes explicitly) on TV, in movies, on billboards, we hear it on the radio, and most frequently, we see it when someone is trying to sell us things. We even see sex when we go to the doctor’s office, resting on tables and shelves in magazines. So why aren’t we talking about it?

Laura Widman, postdoctoral professor at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, did a study on the use of contraception with her colleagues. According to their findings, of a sample of 603 adolescents, only about half even discussed contraception with their partners prior to first intercourse. Now I’m no math major, but even I know those aren’t promising odds.

There are hundreds of theories out there about why we don’t communicate openly about sex with other people, but that’s another topic for another day. What I would like to do right now is urge you to talk about it. Yeah sure, it’ll be uncomfortable at first, but I promise it can only work in your favor. How will your partner know you like it when they bite your neck if you don’t tell them?

Not only is communication necessary in regards to safety and the possibility of sexually transmitted infections, but it can also make sex 100 times more enjoyable for you and your partner(s).
According to the National Health and Social Life Survey, while 75 percent of men always reach orgasm during sex, only 29 percent of women report the same.
Now folks…this is a real tragedy. But don’t worry ladies; I have a foolproof method for getting that number up.

If you guessed it was communication, to quote the rapper OG Maco, “You was right.”
If you’d like to maintain a safe and healthy sexual relationship with your partner, as well as maximize the enjoyment of sex for everyone involved, speak up. Communicate with your partner about your sexual history. Tell them what you’d like them to do more often, as well as what you’d like them to do less or stop doing altogether.

If we all start talking to each other, sex can truly be a wonderful thing.